2024年广东一模读后续写讲解

2024届广东省一模读后续写范文及音频

下水作文 ｜ 广东一模英语试题（读后续写）2024.3

拥抱企鹅 | 2024广东省一模读后续写（微技能）

20240314广东一模读后续写-Join the penguin huddle to stay warm

第二节(满分25分)
阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成- -篇完整的短文。
    When Mary entered the South Pole Penguin Research Lab, she saw her friend Tom gently stroking (轻抚) a penguin in his arms. As children of the lab scientists, Mary and Tom often observed the emperor penguins that were studied to understand how they adapted to extreme temperatures- -insights that could aid human survival.
    “We're thirteen, Tom. It's time to grow up and stop playing with the lab penguins,” said Mary as she started cleaning. “They're research animals, not pets."
    “But the birds listen to me! ”insisted Tom，his breath forming a cloud in the freezing air. “You're just trying to be a penguin whisperer again，”Mary replied，shaking her head with a gentle smile. The penguins seemed playful, as they walked, dove, swam and chased their live fish for sport before eating.
    Suddenly, an alarm rang out and red lights flashed，signaling a problem. The kids rushed over to look into it. “ It’s colder than before- there's ice forming on the water,” noted Tom. Though always cold, Mary had never seen ice here before. She checked the habitat monitor and found that the temperature had gone down a lot. “ The heater must be broken!"
    Mary quickly sent a message to their parents' research team, who were conducting outdoor studies. With the adults away, the kids would have to deal with the freezing conditions until help arrived.
    Time dragged as Mary and Tom anxiously waited. The increasing cold caused them to shake. “I wonder what emperor penguins do in extreme cold, since they stay in the Pole all winter instead of going, somewhere warmer," asked Mary. “They huddle (挤作一团),” Tom answered.“ They huddle together tightly so that the birds in the middle will be warm enough.” “What about the ones on the edge?" Mary asked.“ They push their way towards the center，and then move back out to the edge, and struggle back again. Scientists in the early 21st century recorded it. ”He replied as he stared at the large crowd of the penguins in the lab.
注意:
1.续写词数应为150左右;
2.请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答。

“I have an idea to stay warm!” Tom shouted excitedly. ___________
Two and a half hours later, the parents returned with help. ______

    当玛丽进入南极企鹅研究实验室时，她看到她的朋友汤姆轻轻地抚摸着他怀里的一只企鹅。作为实验室科学家的孩子，玛丽和汤姆经常观察被研究的帝企鹅，以了解它们是如何适应极端温度的——这些见解可以帮助人类生存。

    “我们十三岁了，汤姆。是时候长大了，别再和实验室里的企鹅玩了，”玛丽开始打扫卫生时说。“它们是研究动物，而不是宠物。”
    “但企鹅们听我说！”汤姆坚持说，他的呼吸在冰冷的空气中形成了一团云。“你只是想再次成为一个企鹅语者，”玛丽回答，摇摇头，带着温柔的微笑。企鹅们看起来很顽皮，它们在进食前散步、潜水、游泳和追逐活鱼。
    突然，警报响起，红灯闪烁，表明有问题。孩子们冲过去看了看。汤姆说：“现在比以前冷了，水上结冰了。” 尽管玛丽总是很冷，但她以前从未在这里见过冰。她查看了栖息地的监测器，发现温度下降了很多。“加热器一定坏了！”
    玛丽很快给他们父母的研究小组发了一条信息；他们正在进行户外研究。由于大人不在，孩子们将不得不应对寒冷的天气，直到救援人员到来。
    玛丽和汤姆焦急地等待着，时间过得很慢。越来越冷使他们发抖。玛丽问道：“我想知道帝企鹅在极冷的时候会做什么，因为它们整个冬天都呆在极地，而不是去更温暖的地方。”汤姆回答道：“它们挤在一起，这样中间的企鹅就足够温暖了”。“边缘的企鹅呢？”玛丽问道。“它们向中心挤去，然后又回到边缘，又挣扎着回来。21世纪初的科学家记录了这一点。”他凝视着实验室里的大群企鹅回答道。

【写作导语】

关键能力：本篇书面表达属于读后续写。

故事发生的地点在南极企鹅研究实验室，主要人物Mary以及Tom是实验室科学家的孩子，这样的设定比较新颖。

文章讲述的是一个关于爱护动物以及创造性地解决问题的故事，续写的情节具有一定的开放性，有利于考查学生的创新思维。根据故事的发展逻辑和两个给出的段落起始句的信息，第一段应该主要写Tom如何帮助企鹅取暖，第二段应该写父母的反应以及Tom的收获和感悟。

第一段: “I have an idea to stay warm!” Tom shouted excitedly.
①（与前一句衔接）到底是什么idea
②（过渡）Mary又是怎么想的
③（承上启下）Tom的想法和做法能起作用吗?
第二段: Two and a half hours later, the parents returned with help.
①（与前一句衔接）父母回来后的反应
②（过渡）父母亲怎样评价他们俩
③（收尾）他们从中学会了什么

“I have an idea to stay warm!” Tom shouted excitedly. With those words, Tom went slowly straight to the penguins, stretching his arms. Puzzled, Mary hesitated but had to follow Tom to deal with the freezing condition.“What’s your idea?” Mary asked, shaking, because of the sharp down of the temperature. On arrival of the penguin huddle, Tom fondled the penguins at the edge. Some of them stepped back a little first and then leaned against Tom as if they were old friends. Mary joined him in the huddle and just as the penguins did, they felt good though it was turning colder. (93 words)

“我有个保暖的主意！”汤姆兴奋地喊道。说着，汤姆慢慢地伸着胳膊，径直走向企鹅们。玛丽感到困惑，犹豫了一下，但不得不跟随汤姆去处理冰冻的情况。“你的主意是什么？”由于气温骤降，玛丽颤抖着问道。企鹅团一到，汤姆就抚摸着边缘的企鹅。它们中的一些先退了一步，然后靠在汤姆身上，好像他们是老朋友一样。玛丽和他一起挤在一起，就像企鹅们一样，尽管天气越来越冷，但他们感觉很好。（93字）

Two and a half hours later, the parents returned with help. What surprised them was that nothing was wrong with the two kids! Instead, they were absorbed in the “game” with the penguins, pushing themselves to the center and then moving out. So amazing! When asked why they did so, Tom answered proudly, “I once read a story by the scientists saying the emperor penguins would carry out such efficient actions to stay warm.” Their parents and other scientists praised Tom and Mary for their wide range of knowledge and applying it in time. To the brother and sister, it was a valuable lesson, learning to survive in life. (98 words)

两个半小时后，父母带着帮助回来了。让他们惊讶的是，这两个孩子没有出什么问题！相反，他们全神贯注于与企鹅的“游戏”，把自己推到中心，然后离开。太神奇了！当被问及他们为什么这么做时，汤姆自豪地回答说：“我曾经读过一个科学家的故事，说帝企鹅会采取如此有效的行动来保暖。”他们的父母和其他科学家称赞汤姆和玛丽的知识面广，并及时应用。对这对兄妹来说，这是一堂宝贵的课，学习如何在生活中生存。（98字）

Two and a half hours later, the parents returned with help. Rushing in calling for the kids, they were surprised. The children were safely surrounded by Emperors in a large bundle. When asked how they stayed warm, the kids looked at each other proudly. “We used what the Emperor Penguins do,” they told their parents. Mary patted Tom’s shoulder with admiration, calling him a penguin whisperer. With a big smile, Tom gave credit to the penguins who taught them a lot. Their teamwork had seen them through the difficult cold with the penguins’ aid.

版本1:
“我有个保暖的主意！”汤姆兴奋地喊道。他张开双臂，建议加入企鹅群。玛丽担心企鹅们不让他们进来，犹豫了一下，但很快被汤姆那令人放心的笑容说服了。他慢慢地走近拥挤的企鹅，蹲了下来。他小心翼翼地轻轻地抚摸着他们，轻声地说。尽管一开始很吃惊，企鹅们还是认出了汤姆，让他加入了他们的队伍。玛丽很快跟上了。孩子们和企鹅们挤在一起。正如这些企鹅所做的那样，它们向中间移动，并随着队伍的移动而后退。
两个半小时后，父母带着帮助回来了。他们冲进来叫孩子们，很惊讶。孩子们被帝企鹅们安全地围成一团。当被问及如何保暖时，孩子们骄傲地看着对方。“我们用的是帝企鹅的做法，”他们告诉父母。玛丽钦佩地拍了拍汤姆的肩膀，称他为企鹅语者。带着灿烂的笑容，汤姆称赞企鹅们教会了他们很多。在企鹅的帮助下，他们的团队合作帮助他们度过了严寒。

版本2：

“我有个保暖的主意！”汤姆兴奋地喊道。汤姆建议加入企鹅们一起取暖。玛丽犹豫了一下，担心企鹅不会接受它们。汤姆自信地咧嘴笑着，走近那些由于气温原因已经挤在一起的企鹅。他慢慢地、温柔地蹲下来靠近企鹅，伸出双手，深情地抚摸着它们，轻声安慰它们。虽然一开始很惊慌，但企鹅们认出了他，并亲密地让他挤在一起。玛丽迅速地跟在他的后面。两个孩子从人群的边缘挤到中心，然后像企鹅一样随着水流回到边缘。

两个半小时后，父母带着帮助回来了。当父母冲进来大声喊出孩子们的名字时，他们惊讶地看到孩子们被一大群企鹅紧紧地包围着，安然无恙。当被问及他们是如何抵御这种可怕的寒冷时，两个孩子交换了一眼，自豪地告诉他们，这是帝企鹅帮助他们保暖的秘密。玛丽拍了拍汤姆的肩膀，由衷地钦佩地说：“你是一个真正的企鹅语者！”汤姆脸上亮着一束光束，称赞企鹅们教给他的东西。

【写作详解】
【高分句型与描写1】 Spreading his arms, he suggested joining the penguin huddles. He slowly approached the crowded penguins, crouching down. Gently stroking them with care, he whispered softly. (非谓语动词做状语) 他张开双臂，建议加入企鹅群。他慢慢地走近拥挤的企鹅，蹲了下来。他小心翼翼地轻轻地抚摸着他们，轻声地说。
【高分句型与描写 2】Slowly and gently, he crouched down to get close to the penguins, reached out his hands and stroke them with great affection, whispering to them soothingly. (动作链描写) 他慢慢地、温柔地蹲下来靠近企鹅，伸出双手，深情地抚摸着它们，轻声安慰它们。
Patting Tom on his shoulder, Mary said with sincere admiration, “You are a true penguin whisperer!” (回应原文)  玛丽拍了拍汤姆的肩膀，由衷地赞叹道：“你真是个企鹅语者！”
With a big smile, Tom gave credit to the penguins who taught them a lot. Their teamwork had seen them through the difficult cold with the penguins’ aid. (精彩点题) 带着灿烂的笑容，汤姆称赞企鹅们教会了他们很多。在企鹅的帮助下，他们的团队合作帮助他们度过了严寒。